I Have Charisma

So, at my exit interview, I was told that one of my good points, one that will apparently get me far, was that I have "charisma".

"Charisma" with a 'cha', as in char-kuey-teow.

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Feeling:

A Lady of Leisure .. Briefly

I've quit! I've quit! I've quiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttt!!!!

*G*

I submitted my notice of resignation last Friday, and will now proceed to while away my last week here with hours of Gamebitz's BubbleBubble! Mua ha ha ha haaaaaaaa!!!

I will then enjoy my two weeks off before starting as an R&D Engineer with Perodua (yay!) come August. General plans are: go house-hunting (Min cepat balik!), rescue my hunny bunny from tapau lunches, and leeeeeeeeeelax!!

Aaaaah ... the simple life.



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Feeling:

Foolish Dreams?

I've been thinking.

*jejeng*

Lol.

So, I was sitting at my desk, bored out of my skull, alternately working on the fecking MTO whilst playing Minesweeper, and I started thinking, right? I started thinking of the things I used to want, the things I always thought would make me complete, right? Like, the way I felt two years ago when .. *aherrm* .. when I was young(er) and in love with somebody else. And as I thought of the thoughts I used to think when I thought thoughts of what I thought I wanted (eheh), I (as in present, old(er) me) thought to myself and chuckled, "My, wasn't I naive?"

Then I stopped, mid-chuckle. Wait a minute. Why do I, now, think I was naive then?

I suppose being naive is believing in ideals, wanting those ideals and believing those ideals to be real, to be achievable and reasonable, when people who know better know they don't exist in the real world, that they are only the fanciful notions these young whippersnappers get.. Ooooooh, wait til they really grow up, they'll know better.

And it made me wonder, when did I become so jaded?

Were all the things I wished for then really so ridiculous? Were they really nothing but the fanciful ideals of a person only just getting the hang of this 'being an adult' business?

Were they naive because now that I am wiser and know better, I know that they are all things that will most likely never come true?

Or were they naive because they were fanciful ideas impressed upon me by my peers, romance novels, American soaps and teen dramas, which I will unashamedly admit I watched copiously in my teens?

Or do I only believe now that they cannot possibly come true because I've let myself become affected by the cynicism which seems to be the prerequisite for being an 'adult'? Look at all those kids trying to be 'mature', has nobody ever wondered why they are so cynical, so sarcastic, their comments so biting? Undoubtedly, they take it to extremes, even those 8-year-olds nowadays, but has nobody ever wondered where they learn it from? Does nobody ask, "Who are these children emulating?"

So, which is true?

I don't know, but I'm starting to think that, y'know, if all those/these things I want/wanted are good, so what if everyone else thinks I am naive, unrealistic, foolish. Why should I give up trying just because nobody thinks it can be done. I think it can be done, and I will make it happen. I don't see why I should give up a dream just because other people laugh at me. Their derision is not worth the sacrifice of my ideals.

And there may be a reason for all those foolish themes in all those books/dramas/stories I read as a teen; that a lot of other people often wish for the same things too.

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Feeling: